FREE ESSAY ON GENDER COMMUNICATION IN THE WORKPLACE

GENDER COMMUNICATION IN THE WORKPLACE

Communication between males and females has always been somewhat complicated. Because we
are arguing that males and females have different cultures we wanted to take a look at
what some of these differences might be. According to our research the inherent
differences between male and female culture are the different roles that society holds
for them and the ways these roles lead to different communication styles. The stereotypes
that men and women grow up with affect the types of ways in which they communicate. We
first wanted to take a look at how they specifically differ while men and women are
arguing or having normal conversations. We also looked at the different types of networks
that men and women share. These networks also differ and as do the reasonings for their
formation. Although we do not think that men and women need to change their cultures to
effectively communicate, we do think that better communication is possible. 
One of the researchers we took a look at was Deborah Tannen. According to Tannen the
reason that men and women do not communicate well is that men and women use language
differently. Women take the attitude that conversation is to explore solutions to common
problems while men concern themselves more with getting information and hard data from
conversation. Tannen states that what women look for in communication is human
connection, while men consider status to be most important. They are looking for
independence and are constantly looking for higher accomplishments. Intimacy threatens
this independence, so men have a tendency to avoid it. 
One of the old sayings about women is that they talk more than men. It turns out that it
is not necessarily true. Women seem to talk more in private conversations than do men.
Women do not generally have a fear of intimacy and therefore are much more open with one
another during private conversations. It is more difficult for women to use this type of
communication style in the public arena. In that case it is men that do most of the
talking. 
Tannen ultimately argues that men use communication as a weapon. They use long
explanations to command attention from who it is they are speaking to. They use it to
convey information and to ultimately gain agreement. Tannen suggests that through even
simple conversation men are continually protecting their status. She suggests the reason
that women dominate private conversation is that once men get home they do not feel the
need to continue to protect their status so they remain quiet. This causes women to
become more vocal.
Tannen suggests that status affects many different ways in which men communicate and
raises several different examples. One area she found was that men tell more stories and
jokes than women. She suggests that they are not doing this to be funny but instead do it
to again to negotiate status. They often tell stories in which they are the heroes and
act alone to overcome obstacles. While women use storytelling to gain support from her
personal networks. They use their stories that, if they are the subject of, contain her
doing something foolish to put her at the same level as the listener. In this way women
are not concerned with status as with relating and gaining support. 
Men and women also differ when they are listening. While women tend to use eye contact
and head nods to let the speaker know that she is listening. Men often do not use these
techniques because they suggest agreement with the speaker. Women also a technique which
Tannen calls cooperative overlap. This happens sometimes when women start to speak before
the other person finishers speaking. They usually do this to agree and show support for
what the speaker is saying. Women see cooperative overlap as a way to continue the
conversation while men see it as a competitive ploy to gain control of that conversation.

In this way communication again is not made clear, men are annoyed because they believe
that the women are trying to dominate the conversation while women are annoyed because
men will frequently try to change the subject. 
One of the most common examples that most people use when talking about the differences
in which men and women ask questions, is asking for directions. Since men are concerned
with status and are willing to protect it men do not have the tendency to stop and ask
for directions. Men see this type of action as almost a form of intimacy because it
implies that they need help. Women on the other hand do not have the same problem. Women
ask questions to establish connections with others and stopping and asking for directions
helps them do that.
An example that Tannen uses that seems to conflict more conflict is what is generally
referred to as nagging. Through her research she has shone men hate to be told to do
anything. Women are inclined to repeat a request that does not get a response because
they are convinced that men will do the request if they only understand that they really
want it done. Men on the other hand do not want to do the request because it seems that
they are the ones taking orders, so they put off fulfilling it so it seems that they are
doing it out of their own free will. 
Tannen suggests that what men and women are doing are sending meta-messages back and
forth. These meta-messages are the underlying meaning in what men and women are saying.
She suggests that once people are able to decipher some of these meta-messages more
effective communication is possible. 
Another area that we researched were the differences in men and women's personal
networks. We found that when compared to men, women have more family ties than non-family
ties. Men also have family ties but are more likely to include co-workers in their
networks. What this suggests is that women are less able to use networks as resources
while men find their networks useful in finding jobs and advancing their careers. In this
way, men have more extensive ties than women. 
The main reason for these differences are that men and women have different opportunities
to form these networks. Men and women interact in different ways socially. Because of
differing positions in the workplace, in marital roles, and in parenting, social
opportunities are different. Work related factors such as paid employment, educational
attainment and income increase the number of ties outside the family. Although it has
been found that most of these differences are erased if variables such as employment,
family, and age are similar for men and women, it remains true that women have a larger
more diversified network of family ties. In the business world, women must face many
obstacles to succeed. Women have to adapt to a male-dominated culture to be promoted and
rewarded. Research has shown that communication styles between males and females can
create conflict in the work environment. Typically, women are seen as emotional, flighty,
and gossipy. Men, on the other hand are seen as competitive, goal-oriented, and
aggressive. When faced with trying to adapt to these male characteristics, women
encounter many different obstacles.
One obstacle a success-oriented woman faces is the stereotypes generated by society.
Since women are typically not seen as business oriented, any women who are actually
business oriented are faced with discrimination. They are called pushy, angry, and
accused of sleeping their way to the top. A woman who has to face these types of
accusations and stereotypes cannot effectively complete the tasks assigned to her. 
Much of the conflict facing women in the business world can be seen in Cheris Kramarae's
Muted Group Theory. Because language is a 
Man-made construction. The language of a particular culture does not serve all its
speakers equally, for not all speakers contribute in an equal fashion to its formulation.
Women(and members of other subordinate groups) are not as free or as able as men are to
say what they wish, when and where they wish, because the words and the norms for their
use have been formulated by the dominant group, men.(Griffin, 459).
Kramarae believes that because language is a man-made construction, women are unable to
effectively communicate. Women who try to communicate with men effectively are unable,
because language aids in defining, depreciating and excluding women(459). Kramarae
believes that women are depicted by artists and writers as too emotional, and this
contributes to the stereotypes formed in society. The muted group idea was introduced
originally by Edwin Ardener, a social anthropologist. He believed that there could never
be a complete understanding of a culture without understanding the communication styles
of women and men. Until Ardener, sociologists had only studied the language patterns and
communication styles of men. Ardener showed that the styles of communication between men
and women are so different, they must be studied in conjunction to form a complete
understanding of a culture.
As part of our research, we conducted an interview with Julie Sloan, Food Service
Director of Marriott. She has worked for Marriott for eighteen years, and advanced
quickly in this male-dominated company. When asked what she felt were the obstacles
facing women in the business world, Ms. Sloan stated women are faced with stereotypes,
excuses and discrimination. She felt that the biggest obstacles facing women was women
themselves. She felt that women had created the idea of a glass ceiling to create an
excuse for failure. The glass ceiling is the idea that women are prevented from
succeeding in business because of stereotypes and an invisible barrier created by men.
Ms. Sloan also felt that adapting to a male dominated culture was not difficult for her.
She feels that she has always been success-oriented, and does not find this to be a
typical male trait. Our surveys and research found however, that these types of traits
are normally associated with men within the business world. 
Through our research, we found that in a male dominated society, adapt to the male styles
of communication. As we have previously stated, the styles of communication between
genders differ greatly. Men tend to use conversation to obtain data whereas women use
conversation to create connections. Through our research, we also came up with some
solutions for bridging the communication gaps between males and females. To reduce
miscommunication, males and females must learn to interpret the messages being sent to
them. They must learn to understand the speakers' motives and background. In effective
communication, one must realize the experiences of the speaker and listener, and work to
create a common understanding of the messages being created. Males should try to
understand the female need for connection whereas females need to understand the male
need for data. If the two cultures can learn to combine their styles by offering
information while creating a connection, the male and female communication gap will be
bridged.
Bibliography
Annotated Bibliography
Griffin, EM. A First Look at Communication Theory. 
New York, 1997.